I grab a chair from the kitchen
Moving it to the centre of the room
Where a noose hangs from the ceiling
I learnt the hangman’s knot
From the scouts
One of the only things I could do right
I stood up on the chair
And looked around my living room
So dark, so empty
There’s no substance
Empty pots, dirty plates
There’s no living here
The window shows me
The bleak landcsape of the moors
Lifeless, dead trees
Grey skies
Carcasses of sheep
I look through the noose
A land of sharp, green grass
Vibrant, powerful colours
Flowers of the rainbow
Pure white skies
Bustling wildlife, birds of paradise
Singing sweet songs of euphoria
I kick the chair
My neck doesn’t break
So I guess I’ll just have to wait
The two worlds merge together
Like broken clips of film
Till I’ve lost all distinction between the two
Out of focus, blurry
The pixels dislodge and fly off
In all directions
Losing colour as they fizzle out
Fading into a harmonious white
My body breaks up
Melting into the white fabric
I see bits of memory float away
Dreams, reality, nothing..